Intro: The Graduate

This was originally supposed to be my “About Me” but thank God they put a 1,200-character limit on those things, so instead, here is my introductory post.

I am the incarnate soul of Benjamin Braddock, living in the second decade of the 21st century.  I am a charismatic, intelligent, and good looking (blah, blah, blah) young college graduate who had his life all perfectly ordered until the diploma landed in his hand.  It was at that moment that I realized that my whole life I had been drawing a blueprint for a life that was not my own.  I was unleashed into a world with too many choices and not enough discipline, too many hormones and not enough restraint, too many questions and not enough answers.


Driven to near insanity by all of this confusion, I embarked on a 90-day, 18,000-mile roadtrip across North America (to get rid of all of the confusion of course...HA!).  On this journey I succeeded at blowing my life savings (on gasoline and camping supplies), meeting my own Mrs. Robinson (she was Québécoise, go figure), witnessing the beauty of nature like I’d never imagined, reconnecting with my family roots in Alaska, experiencing the birth of my nephew in Vancouver, accumulating a lifetime supply of life lessons, and propelling my life into complete ambiguity.  Somehow I found myself back in New York City, exactly where I started, except even more confused with even fewer answers than when I started (gee, who could've seen that coming?!).

So today I reside in Chelsea, Manhattan with my Bachelor of Arts in Politics, Philosophy, and Economics hanging on the wall of my overpriced apartment, enslaved by my self-induced ambiguity.  I am way too inexperienced in anything practical and way too experienced in everything universal and hypothetical to be of any use to any prospective entry-level job.  I could probably rule the country pretty well if given the chance, but ask me to be a barista at Starbucks and you have a disaster on your hands.  

I spend most of my days planning out my hypothetical rise to wealth and fame, while lacking the actual discipline or stability required to implement any of my plans.  I tried rejecting the world of “doing” and embracing the world of “being” in accordance with a nostalgic view of 1960s Existentialism, only to realize that in New York City, that’s what makes you homeless.  In this city nobody really gives a fuck who you are, they just care about what you can do for them.

Alas, I find myself in the wrong place at the wrong time--in the City of Action, suspended in a State of Inaction.  What’s a hopeless, bleeding heart Philosopher King-trainee to do?  Give up everything he’s worked for, throw in the towel, and move back to Cincinnati?  Sell out, shut up, and join the rest of New York in pursuing a career that I hate?  Or maybe I should just barely get by (you know, make enough money to almost cover my bills then embarrassingly ask my hardworking, disciplined, Protestant-work-ethicked parents for a bailout to cover my last $200 of rent and utilities), work part-time at Starbucks with way too much time to philosophize, hypothesize, watch the entire series of Nip/Tuck, and set up a blog all the while changing the world one day at a time?  DUH...I chose the third option.  Welcome to the life of Wyatt Baker.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you.